Running Like Criminals

Vientienne flight to Hanoi - overnight bus - Hoi An - overnight bus - Nha Trang - overnight bus...
There are bizarre checkpoints for buses every hour or so. I feel like a criminal, flying through Vietnam in a week just because we got lazy and stayed too long in Thailand and especially Laos. What are we running from!? It is a shame; it's like we came to Vietnam just to see bus stops and sunrises from grimy windows. But in all seriousness, we came to Vietnam to purchase suits!! Custom-made, tailored suits in Hoi An, where over 500 tailor shops make anything and everything for you overnight. You should have seen us carrying bags to the post office like 16 year old girls with mommy's credit card (although it easy to meet new girls while shopping). For a little over $200, I got: 1 three piece suit, 1 black suit, 1 custom made dress shirt, 1 custom made pair of dress shoes, 1 pair of heels with straps up the ankles for Erica (right out of a magazine), one pants suit with an awesome jacket for Mommy, and 2 sports jackets for Daddio. Oh, and they stitched up our shorts that we wear everyday in Asia for free. Lovely ladies, really.
Now we're at the beach in Nha Trang, down the coast a bit and inching closer to Saigon. The only touristy thing we'll end up doing is hopefully seeing the Kuchi tunnels. Tomorrow we're going to some spa to bathe in mud, and maybe do some parasailing in the afternoon. Nha Trang is rich, and reminds me of Nice, but with sandy beaches not stones. There are 6km of beach and nice trees and promenades lining the way. Best of all, we haven't been hassled here as much as expected. I actually relaxed, read my book, and flew a kite with some kids for a few hours without any women chasing me down the beach trying to give me a massage.
After we rode to the beach on the backs of motorcycles in Hoi An (nicer beach I'd say but quiet), I started thinking about all the crazy transportation situations we've been in. There was the time Tom slept on the floor of the mini-bus with his head sandwiched between the doors as we hugged the corners of the mountain passes of Laos between Luang Prabang and Phonsavan. Then there was the next journey to Vang Vieng, where I watched Scott jump and bring his legs up in the air each time the man across from him (dozing) let his AK-47 slip and slam hard against the bus floor. The dude was in civilian clothes and never smiled, but we think he worked for the bus company to help foil hijackings...I offered him bananas to make sure he was cool with us (40 cents for a bag full off the side of the road!). That same trip our tire actually exploded, which really sounded like the gun went off! I guess one good breakdown story was a must. In Hanoi the other night we hired crazy rickshaws after dinner - the guy sits behind you so you're in a carriage in the front facing traffic (and the fear of death) at every intersection. The picture I took of Scott next to me looks like he's in a wheel chair! In Hoi An I almost forgot cars existed. There are so many types of bikes and motorbikes that when you see a car you're almost shocked. Last night our seat on the bus were broken and each time we hit a bump (just imagine how smooth and consistent the roads are) our seat-backs would lurch into new positions and scare the nice girl behind us. Craziness, but I actually slept a bit, and awoke to a gorgeous sunrise over the rice paddies. You got to focus on the good parts of the trip - that's what you'll remember and that's what gets you through with a smile.
Basically traveling has been crazy lately, and I am sore in strange places! At some point we're gonna have to slow our pace - I think India. Camels in the desert of Rajistan, that will be nice and slow.
The communist thing is really a joke for foreigners. Landing in Hanoi is like LAX or West Palm Beach, not what you'd imagine from some old movie about Vietnam. And tourists never really feel the politics - at least not unless you do something very wrong. We spoke at length with some Americans living in Beijing who described China as an entirely different story - fake news, propaganda, censorship, Japan-hatred and bizarre forms of educated xenophobia. Laos and Vietnam might as well be democratic as far as a brief traveler can tell. Laws are lax and the people care much more about their livelihood then their leaders.